Tragedy to Comedy the Tale of My Wedding

This week's Writer's Workshop Prompts were:

1. Describe something you're proud of.
2. Tell me your most humorous wedding experience
3. 10 reasons why you can't sleep at night
4. Describe an experience that you wish you could shake from your memory.
5. Write a love letter to the object of your affection.

Hmmm all the prompts are great...I would like to choose 4, title it "How to Loose your Job in 9mo"....but I am sure there may be some liability if anyone from the office reads it and I can't afford a law suit (or returning my settlement!)

Number 3 is easy, but would just be a list, worry, grief, fear, children, children, cat, children...that's not a ton of fun.

So I will tell our most humorous wedding story (#2).

At the time of our wedding, nothing was humorous, especially to me. We got married in October 2001. Yep, three weeks after September 11. We changed so many of our plans because of 9/11 because it all seemed trivial, even the wedding. We seriously, for a fleeting moment considered postponing it. We financially couldn't have, but we wanted to. Family were being called into service, our best man spent a week stuck in Co because planes weren't flying. We were flying to Italy 4 weeks after 9/11, we were worried we wouldn't be able to get home again if something else happened. The day of was very stressful and the memories are always overshadowed by 9/11.

However when you look back much of it was pretty funny. Especially my stubbornness...which usually leads to funny situations. The day started out with me getting up very early, I wanted to walk to the farmers market to get roses for my flower girls flower ball she was going to carry. Yep on the morning of my wedding I decided to not only make my own flower girl piece, but to walk over a mile to do it. I thought the walk would calm me down. No. I also didn't buy enough flowers.

Than I was late to the church. Yep, I was late to my own wedding. My husband, was in the back of the church freaking out because none of the girls where at the church. My dad had provided us with all these great homemade snacks in paper cones (so we wouldn't mess up our makeup) and we literally ran in to the church with just enough time to get me dressed. In the meantime the guys were at the back of the church with nothing to eat or drink except for some Goldschlager the best man brought. Several of them almost passed out from hunger and thirst while a flat of water and tons of food were only a few feet away!

The ceremony was great and a total tear fest, we went for maximum emotion. The best part though was that my childhood deacon kept cracking jokes to my husband because he was seriously worried he was going to collapse from fear in front of everyone. At one point he said "Are you sure your breathing because your hands feel like a corpse". To which I, every thoughtful and caring replied, "oh no I work with corpses (don't ask, see above) they are much warmer!"

We made it through the ceremony and headed to a beautiful park where my entire bridal party froze their tushes off because it was the earliest frost and the coldest October in a hundred years (until this year!). I proceeded to give my mom a heart attack by traipsing through the woods in my wedding dress and pretending to fall in the river with hubby holding my arm. I wasn't going to wear the dress again, or sell it so why keep it clean? They were amazing pictures and I loved them. Mom didn't think it was funny and went inside to warm up. I have no pictures of me alone with my mom.

Or My parents for that matter because my dad was trying to take his own pictures. Even after my photographer yelled at him because his flash was messing up hers and I yelled at him because I was PAYING HER to take pictures. So no family pictures, I will forever laugh about that because that sums up my parents so well. So determined to do things their way and not willing to delay gratification at all (the wanted to get the pictures the next day). They miss out on the enjoyment and nicer things.

Finally the reception. Our organizer bailed on us the week before the wedding. The new one I meet with when I brought ALL my stuff guaranteed she would be there. When I arrived I found all my guests waiting outside, instead of in the room enjoying cocktails. I marched in and promptly went all bridezilla on the restaurant manger. The tables were not even set! Thankfully my sister is in the biz and she is a like a little mighty mouse, small and powerful. She marched into the kitchen (if you can't walk into a kitchen don't eat at the restaurant!) and started ordering everyone around! She had them out serving hours'devours in the hall and at the bar while my other sister went in and took over setting the tables.My non confrontational husband even got in on it.

He found the manger and said "If you don't want a scene, you get champagne in that women's glass, now"

"Which woman?"

"The one in the wedding gown you idiot and you keep it full until she stops yelling."

Things calmed down everyone had a great time and aside from the restaurant trying to kill my husband with an item that was specifically in our contract not to be served due to allergies (cue the mighty mouse again!) it was a great night. Most of the people didn't even know there was a problem and we got a few bottles of free champagne.

Like many things it was only stressful because of the expectations we ourselves put on it. Because looking back it was a comedy of errors, like many of my days, and I wouldn't have it any other way.