Thursday, June 3, 2010

Lost and Found



{photo credit Celine Nadeau}






She looks down and her hands rests on the soft flesh of her abdomen. Hard to believe that just a few hours prior it was stretched and hard, filled with hope and excitement. Now it's a lump of soft flesh, empty, hollow. 





Just as the flesh of her abdomen has changed so has the flesh of her chest. The once average mounds swell and enlarge. He once soft breast tissue because hard. They scream to be emptied.





She looks at this strange body she finds herself in and wonders where did she go? This is not me. I was petite and fit, not soft and lumpy. Where did it go, will I ever get it back? She slightly sobs for what was lost.





Am I being vain she wonders? I am not my body, I am so much more. I am strength, and hope, and energy, loving, caring, helpful, that hasn't changed. But to wake up in a body that isn't yours anymore? 





As she starts to form a plan in her head on how to return to the self she once knew, move out of this soft and squishy shell she finds herself in, she hears w imper. Soft at first and than louder. It pulls her instantly from thoughts of herself. She pulls the little pink bundle to her chest and stokes her cheek and realizes, what she has lost isn't important. This little bundle, is worth the vague sense of walking in someone elses body.





It slowly starts to dawn on her this body, it never was hers. It's just a vessel, a borrowed object that is in a constant state of change and purpose. For now it's job is to be soft and squishy. To surround and comfort and feed the small pink bundle. This small pink bundle whose own body is so perfectly formed. 

Such a position to be in, to have given of yourself, to have broken your form to create a more perfect form.





She looks at the sleeping bundle and a tear falls down her cheek. I will forever stay broken,  she thinks to herself, if only this new small wonder never feels as if she is broken. I will forever walk in a body that is not my own, for her to always feel love and confidence in the one she is given. 





I will stop looking for what is lost, because it is found, right here, in a small pink bundle. 







This post is part of Mama Kat's {pretty much world famous} Writer's Workshop. Prompt 2. Join the fun!

15 comments:

Amber Page Writes said...

That was beautiful, wonderful, gorgeous, all the words that mean fantastic! I am inspired now...

Life Without Pink said...

Wow that was such a beautiful post. Love it!

KLZ said...

Over from Mama Kat's

It is so beautiful and so true. My body is not mine anymore and while that was hard to accept at first, now I don't even want it back.

Corinne said...

Mmm... this: "a borrowed object that is in a constant state of change and purpose." has me in tears, because it's so true. We are so much more than this vessel.
Lovely piece.

Shell said...

Wow, girl. Such a beautifully written post.

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Absolutely beautiful.

Jennifer said...

Great post. I love it. Makes me remember that soft pink cheek. Now I want to go home and hug my babies.

Kerri said...

What a wonderful way to be creative with this prompt. I love your take on it.
What a wonderful way to look at one's body.

Two Normal Moms said...

Wow. Everybody's posts are making me teary-eyed today! Beautiful!
***Ally

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Wow, what a beautiful post. Expertly written! I'm blessed to have read it!

Michelle said...

Ooooo that's beautiful! I love that interpretation. Apparently I should have gone to check on the prompts this week. Oops :)

Just Another Mom of 2 said...

This is so beautiful. I'm not even sure how to comment! Wonderful Melissa. Just beautiful.

Mama Kat said...

Ohhh how many of us can relate to this? I just started working out again to try to reclaim that part of me again...I don't think anything is going to firm up the tummy that stretched for my babies though. And you're right. They're worth it.

Preggo said...

This is just great. Such a perfect picture of what it's like. Thanks for sharing - and making me remember that while the losing weight sucks, it was totally worth it. :)

Hear Mum Roar said...

That was just so lovely, and a wonderful way to think about the havoc that is wrecked upon our bodies!

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