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It is quiet.
It’s still dark and the rain is falling (again!) in a melodic calming sort of way. A Slow steady pace that makes the music of spring as it dances on the metal gutters and
Plinks! against the siding and metal table.
Did I mention it’s quiet?
4 am my old friend I have missed you.
Instead of yawning I have a silly school girl grin on my face.
I heat up day old coffee and I just stand by the sink listening to the rain, doing calf raises and pliés*.
I am itching to run.
To wrap myself in the familiarity of my old friend 4am. To welcome the my running partner the sun as we start the day and explore the neighborhood.
It’s raining and I haven’t run in over a year. So instead I sit and listen to the rain and I stare at my pretty new shelves and my mind spins and wonders.
This week is crazy busy, so many things scheduled on top of so many things, on top of cleaning up after one storm after another storm after a... could we please just have normal weather? All day everyday we are running and everyone is tired. I fell asleep with he baby at 6pm last night, which is the real reason I am able to sit with my old friend 4 am and realize how much missed him.
But maybe it’s not 4 am I miss but the quiet? The run? The time on my own?
Babies are such blessing and this one is no different. So special so amazing. They are also exhausting. Especially when they only want mama. So this, this quiet time to sit in a chair (and not in bed) and
Type out thoughts while listening to the
Plop! of rain. This is rare.
So I will scoop up 4 am and I will wrap it around myself and I will take it all in. I will let the silence envelop me and massage my tired and battered it’s summer! we must go! at full speed! and full volume! mommy brain. I will drink my coffee hot (!!!) and I will remember as fleeting as this moment right now seems the louder more constant moments. running! yelling!crying! needing! will be even more fleeting. And when 4 am and I are good friends again trotting down the road with our friend sun my mind will wander back to those loud and crazy times, sleepless night snuggles in bed with a little one and I will wonder where this time went.
Simply musing on quiet and time, that’s my Simple Moment, Bigger Picture this week. What’s yours?
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* Old habits die hard, my high school gymnastic coach (who never stood still or walked anywhere) always made us do something, anything, while standing waiting for a turn and I find it's one of those things that now many, many years later I still find myself doing all the time.