Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Red Marks

F
It was written across the page in angry red pen staring in contrast to the white page. Standing out from the stack of other papers that surround it,most with it’s complete opposite A on them. It was his first, the first red mark that has truly taught him an important lesson. We are not always perfect. As he cried in his bed about the red mark we reminded him of that. We are not perfect. We learn more from mistakes than we do from or successes. He’s not in trouble, it’s only one mark, one ding on an otherwise very remarkable record. Our words fell flat against the sting of those red marks and he cried himself to sleep. We are not perfect. I am struggling. There are red marks all over my page with the F glaring back at me bright red. Projects left undone, tasks unfinished, goals unmet. We are not perfect I tell him, we learn from our mistakes. How can I expect him to believe that when all he sees is us striving for perfection? 


Stressing over un-written words, un-washed floors, un-finished projects and un-tidy home? My red marks are not on one assignment but on a life I feel I am somehow failing. On ideals and goals that are unattainable. My red marks weren’t put there by anyone else, I put them there myself. We are not perfect. Maybe it’s time to revisit the grading system in my head. There is only one that is perfect, and He loves me as I am. Just as I love my son as he is. He loves me as I am, they way He created me to be. The ideals in my head are not His ideals they are mine. It’s time to get out the red pen and make some revisions, edit, edit and edit some more until I learn, as I teach... We are not perfect.


5 comments:

Lenae said...

"My red marks are not on one assignment but on a life I feel I am somehow failing." Oh, this resonated with me. Here's to revising, and letting things go that are self-imposed, and not from Him.

~michelle pendergrass said...

Love this! Accepting that I am not perfect or that I shouldn't strive to be perfect has been a life-long battle.

Stephanie said...

"Maybe it’s time to revisit the grading system in my head. There is only one that is perfect, and He loves me as I am." I was talking to a sweet friend today and we were thinking about how it must have grieved God to know that Adam and Eve had sinned. And even more, He knew even before He created them that they would fail...and He knew what that failure would cost Him...and yet, He still chose to create them, to give US life, knowing we would sin, time and time again. And yet He still loves us. It seems so impossible to believe and I feel so unworthy...because I am. No, I am not perfect, but I serve one who IS...and, because of what He did on the cross for me, I can be declared righteous too. Oh, it is sometimes just too much to comprehend but so wonderful to behold.

One Bad Mama Jamma said...

I needed to read about red marks today. It was one of those days where I didn't have enough time, hands and nothing went right.

Tomorrow is a new day and attitude is everything right?

Lucy The Valiant said...

I love this! Exactly the kind of thing I've been realizing lately, too!

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