You get a lot of questions when you're pregnant, especially when you are showing as much as I am. I sometimes have a hard time answering these questions because people don't generally don't expect to talk about death and miscarriage, they just want to know about your pregnancy.
With this pregnancy I came up with a quick response that answers the questions without being snarky but that also pretty much stops any further questions. I generally answer the "Oh is this your first?" or "What number is this?" with this simple answer:
Well this is my sixth pregnancy but it will be our fourth child.
This usually makes a person gasp or "Whoa" when they hear the first half and then immediately shut up and leave me alone, which is what I prefer.
A few weekends ago I took a lovely girls weekend with my best friends. While hanging out in the spa getting massages the massage therapist asked the usual, oh is this your first, and I answered with the above statement.
She paused and had some general, congenial congratulations {I wasn't totally paying attention because it was a massage I didn't want tot talk!}. Than she proceeds to say... "Oh so you had twins?"
Um, no my son died at 18 weeks and I lost another at 7 weeks this past April.
Oh.
I'm so sorry.
Math is apparently hard. Thankfully my girlfriend and I {who was getting the massage with me and has also suffered loss} have a sense of humor and dropped it. We proceeded to go spend the evening chuckling about it. I'm sure she felt worse than me. It was by far the funniest blunder I have had when I just blurt it out.
What's the most awkward response you've had?
1 comment:
oh, hugs to you. <3 this makes me think twice about asking that same question.
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